Feeling a sense of balance in life is hard. Think about it---how often do we say to ourselves, "after ____, then things won't be so busy and it will be a better balance" or "if I could do ____ (or this thing would happen), then things would be better". We, or at least I, seem to feel this tension quite a bit in life.
And here I am searching for balance again. I am excited to have accepted a position as Marketing Coordinator for the Arts Council of Calvert County. This is a part-time position, which will allow me to be in a role where I can promote artists and the Arts in the community (which I discovered with Vantage Point Gallery that I really like to do), AND will allow me time to continue my own art. But as with any new job, there's a lot to learn and that takes focus.
Through the last few weeks, I feel like my art has taken a back seat. And I'm hoping in the next few weeks, I can better strike that balance I'm searching for to allow myself to fully immerse in my position as Marketing Coordinator and also fully immerse in creating art.
Jason and I took an afternoon off to experience the cherry blossoms at the Tidal Basin. I took lots of photos for references and have ideas for multiple cherry blossom paintings!
My reference photo (I love the gnarly, twisted trunk of this tree) and reimagined painting. Alas, painting out my search for balance and an orderly scenario with neat rows of cherry blossoms in an idyllic scene. I realized what I was doing near completion of the painting.
Here's another opportunity for learning to be more comfortable with being uncomfortable. There will never be perfect balance or neatly ordered life scenarios, nor would those likely be satisfying. Meaning in life comes through growth. And growth is uncomfortable.
I keep a note on my phone of quotes I come across that are impactful to me. And this few weeks of trying to find balance made me reflect on a quote by Viktor Frankl.
"Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom."
I want my response to be creative and true to me. It's not finding balance---like something elusive that I'll capture if I'm lucky. I can be creating balance. If I can just remind myself of this and fully embrace it.